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Archive for January, 2008

Just those first two paragraphs, please

Thursday, January 31st, 2008

Rianne, a fellow sun.star editor, arrived in the office one day and asked me why I was so early (10 am). I said I’m writing a column (I can’t write at home. I don’t know why). She said you know what, writing seems to torture you; everytime I see you writing you look like the saddest person on earth. Her exact words: “Grabeng pag-antos nimo anang imong column sa?”

So true. Writing is never a happy experience. And writing the first two paragraphs is the most torturous part, literally, as in “causing great physical or mental anguish”. Give me those first two paragraphs and the rest will be less laborious, but never pleasant, still. So, if someody tells you writing is a wonderful experience so pick up the pen and join us, split his skull open.

‘Mga Koreanong gilambusan sa Kawasan’

Wednesday, January 30th, 2008

After so many attempts at photography, I give up. I could give it another try, but it’s different when somebody you consider a part of yourself is already doing it and is doing it well. (The foto above is hers, and the subjects are her Korean boyfriends, I hate you!.) If you seldom find pictures here in my blog, it’s because she reminds me how I suck at the thing she’s good at. So allow me to introduce to you – ta-daaaaaannn – Ms Cheryl Baldicantos, a lady of great talent, a lady so un-kikay you wonder if she prefers boxer shorts to kinky lingerie (I’m not telling).

Check her out at http://ulannn.multiply.com/

Funny band names

Tuesday, January 29th, 2008

If you had a band, what would you call it? Suggestions:

1) Nasal Sex With Broken Glass
2) Pelvic Meatloaf
3) Dracula Does Calculus
4) A Cat Born In An Oven Isn’t A Cake

Unless you have great music, we can forgive you, like we forgave the ‘Beatles’ and the ‘Eraserheads,’ two great bands with funny names. But if your music is equally silly, then at least you will make it to the list of FUNNIEST BAND NAMES EVER.

Let’s do the beso-beso

Monday, January 28th, 2008

As this column aims to educate, let’s start with etymology. According to my research — which involved the arduous process of typing keywords and clicking search — the word beso is Spanish for “kiss”, as in “beso de Judas”. Do the inflection and you will have “Bésame, bésame mucho, como si fuera esta noche la ultima vez.” Meaning, “Kiss me till my gums bleed or I’ll ask your dad to do it.”

Mad, mad money

Sunday, January 27th, 2008

When people use the phrase “starving artists”, they definitely don’t refer to these musicians. Music is both art and business, a good business at that. But try doing these things at the same time: write songs, produce them, play them live, promote them, and make sure the money keeps coming. Mabuang ka. An artist is seldom a businessman and vice versa. Somebody should take care of the “non-creative” part of music and leave the songwriter to his art.

So who are they referring to by “starving artists”? Most Cebuano bands, of course.

‘Fuck you and your Tagalog market’

Saturday, January 26th, 2008

Between the later part of 2006 and middle of 2007, I received three offers from three record labels to reproduce and distribute Missing Filemon’s two albums – the debut ‘Mising Filemon (Suroysuroy)’ and ‘Sinesine’. “And if things are good, we have money for your third album,” they told me. The condition, and this had to be on contract and non-negotiable: “Write a few songs in Tagalog, and record some Tagalog versions of your old hits.”

I told them something like “Fuck you and your Tagalog market.” I never heard from them again. I was reminded of this after reading Bordowitz on Nirvana and the Seattle ‘grunge’ scene. Read, too, what made Nirvana’s ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ work. If there’s a song that gave me courage to finally quit my seminary studies, this would be it.

The Beatles at ‘SuroySuroy Sugbo’

Friday, January 25th, 2008

Been offline since Wednesday to join Capitol’s “SuroySuroy Sugbo – The Southern Heritage Trail”. The project has a point, really, got to admit. Works good for Cebu Province, works even better for the Gwen Garcia image. What’s the trip all about? It’s actually touring the towns and eating a lot of budbod and bakasi and being shown the same Sinulog dance every 30 minutes. I’ll be writing an article about the experience next week, so that’s it for now.

Big Boy

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2008

IT all started with this one short line in my spam box: “Hi Insoymada. Your partner will be calling you ‘BIG BOY…’”

‘Rock and Roll meant fucking’

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2008

RSO Booksale is having a “clearance sale.” I dropped by its SM City branch this morning and found books priced at half the amount they may probably cost at Power Books. I grabbed a copy of Hank Bordowitz’s “Turning Points in Rock and Roll.” This will surely keep me busy the rest of the week. Here are excerpts from the Introduction:

Just send in the clowns — comment

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2008

“I think the movie was “Patch Adams”, not “Jumanji”. ” — jae

Hahay. I’m a failure in sarcasm. – insoymada

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